Death and Marriage

Introduction

Death and marriage is an interesting subject when we discuss God's more excellent way. Recently, I started re-reading a series, Children of the Promise by Dean Hughes, about an LDS family during World War II. In this series one of the siblings is killed in action. The story discusses the heartache of his fiance who started working for this kid's family, and who had practically become part of the family. In a conversation discussing this young woman the mom of the family says, “She works for us, and I'm not so sure that's the best thing for her. She probably needs to break away from us and forget about the life she thought she was going to have.” Her youngest daughter then said, “I don't want [her] to marry anyone else. I want her to marry [my brother]—in heaven.” I changed the names in case you ever decide to read this series.

Although this story is about a fictional family, it makes a good point. What happens when God or even man takes away the life of someone we love; someone we felt we were destined to be with? The question returns to are we going to trust God?

My Brother
On a little more personal note, this same thing happened to my brother. A little over a year ago, my brother met a girl that he completely adored. Now, my family has not brought forth the most outgoing, popular men in the country. For example, I did not kiss a girl until I was 25, and she is now my wife. Although this brother had not followed in my footsteps as far as that is concerned, he didn't have the best of luck with women either. He finally had a girl he adored, and she adored him back. She planned to move to Utah where they could become officially engaged and finish their schooling together. In addition, his future was finally looking bright. He had gotten a job besides McDonald's and was pursuing a degree that looked promising.

About a month after he had visited this girl and prepared these plans for engagement, my brother was driving through the canyon to his new job. Apparently, the roads were a little icy. He probably hit the last patch of ice that spring until the following winter. His car spun into the lane next to him, where he met a semi at full speed. My brother was killed instantly.

Where is God's more excellent way? Honestly, I don't know yet. However, I do know that God is there and is mindful of us. I hope that some day I can finish this story with the answer to that question, at least in part. What I can do is give you some examples that show there is wisdom in his more excellent way. I don't believe the more excellent way lies where the girl from the book suggested, however. I know my brother was a good kid, the only thing he did wrong was get angry at his older brother who picked on him a little too often. So, I do believe the Lord's going to take care of him. But I don't believe those left in mortality should put their lives on hold so that they can be married in heaven.

I Will Fulfill
In the July Ensign, there was a story about a girl who took longer to get married than she wanted. She believed the gospel teaching that states that we should be married, which I'm afraid too many women take too serious and a few women and men take too lighthearted. She became frustrated that it was taking so long. Then, she read the account found in the Doctrine & Covenants disbanding Zion's Camp, section 105. Verse 13 says, “It is expedient . . . that mine elders should wait for a little season.” Although not an Elder, she realized this scripture was talking to her, so she continued to read. “. . .For as I said in a former commandment, even so I will fulfill—I will fight your battles.”

Although I don't know what's in stored for this girl, I do know that the Lord will fulfill his promises. If she will but wait a little season and trust His loving guidance, she will find that more excellent way. Another great example is Abraham and Sarah as they desired and were promised children; I will discuss this topic in greater detail next week.